For many new mothers, giving birth is one of the most exciting times in life. After all, you’re bringing a new tiny human into the world — one that you love more than pretty much everyone else. You can’t wait to meet the little guy or gal.
In the ideal world, giving birth would be a seamless, painless, uplifting experience. Everything would go according to your birth plan, and you’d meet your bundle of joy quickly, without any hiccups along the way.
Unfortunately, that doesn’t always happen — quite the contrary. According to a recent study, as many as 45 percent of new mothers experience birth trauma.
What is a traumatic birth experience?
A traumatic birth experience occurs when a new mother experiences discomfort or distress during the process of giving birth. Since every woman is unique, each new mother may experience trauma differently.
The overwhelming pain of a negative birth experience can leave lasting emotional scars.
Some of the most common symptoms of birth trauma include:
Anxiety
Anxiety is a common symptom of birth trauma. In fact, up to 85 percent of new mothers experience anxiety after a traumatic birth, according to a study published in the “Canadian Medical Association Journal.”
After an emergency C-section or difficult labor and delivery, you may feel uneasy about going through the process again. You may be anxious about giving birth naturally, especially if you’re afraid your next pregnancy will end the same way your first did. If you experienced a life-threatening situation during childbirth, such as fetal distress or preeclampsia, it’s natural to have fears that those complications could occur during your next birth as well.
What can you do to recover from a traumatic birth?
1. Seek counseling or therapy. A therapist can help you process the emotions you experienced during your birth. They can also offer coping strategies for dealing with PTSD and anxiety.
2. Connect with other mothers who have gone through a traumatic birth experience. There is power in numbers, and connecting with other mothers who understand what you’re going through can be incredibly healing.
3. Join a support group. There are many online and in-person postpartum support groups. Being around other mothers who have been through similar experiences can help you feel less alone.
4. Foster a supportive relationship with your partner after a traumatic birth experience. It may be difficult to open yourself up emotionally, but having a supportive partner can make all the difference in how you process your trauma.
5. Reach out to friends and family members for love and encouragement during this difficult time in your life. Your mother, sisters, and closest girlfriends are always there for you when you need them most — don’t hesitate to reach out if you need their support while recovering from birth trauma.
Depression
Depression is another common symptom of birth trauma. Up to 33 percent of women who experience a traumatic birth will develop postpartum depression, according to a study published in the “Journal of Obstetric, Gynecologic and Neonatal Nursing.”
Symptoms of postpartum depression include:
Lack of interest in activities you used to enjoy
Feeling sad, hopeless, or empty most of the time
Crying more than usual
Difficulty bonding with your baby
Having intrusive thoughts about your baby’s health or well-being
Experiencing panic attacks or anxiety
Suicidal thoughts or feelings
If you are experiencing any of these symptoms, please reach out for help. Postpartum depression is a serious condition that can be treated — but you won’t get better if you don’t ask for help.
Flashbacks
Flashbacks are another common symptom of birth trauma. Many mothers experience vivid memories of their traumatic births, especially in the weeks after delivering their babies.
Being reminded of your negative birth experience can trigger extreme emotional responses like panic or anxiety , leaving you feeling like you’re back at square one. You may feel like your baby isn’t safe or healthy, which only worsens postpartum depression and anxiety symptoms; flashbacks are most often associated with PTSD .
You can recover from birth trauma by focusing on self-care.
Receiving regular prenatal care is important to avoid complications that could lead to an emergency C-section or other complications during labor and delivery. Doing what you can to remain healthy throughout pregnancy will help ensure a positive birthing experience.
If you’ve had a traumatic birth experience, it’s important to seek out counseling or therapy to help you process those emotions. Connecting with other mothers who have gone through something similar can be incredibly healing, and joining a support group is a great way to find hope and healing. Partnering with your partner after a traumatic birth is essential, as they can provide the love and support you need during this difficult time in your life. Friends and family members are also a great resource for love and encouragement. Don’t hesitate to reach out if you need their support while recovering from birth trauma.
Self-care is key when recovering from birth trauma. Make sure to get plenty of rest, eat well, and drink plenty of water. Sticking to a regular exercise routine can help reduce feelings of anxiety and depression, increase energy levels, and improve your mood.
Taking time for yourself is also incredibly important. It may be difficult to open up emotionally after delivering a baby, but connecting with friends or family members can help you process your emotions more effectively than you would on your own.
Nightmares
Nightmares are also common after a traumatic birth. These dreams can be incredibly realistic and leave you feeling scared and anxious when you wake up.
If you are experiencing nightmares, it’s important to talk about them with your partner, friends, or therapist. It may also help to keep a journal of your dreams so that you can track any patterns or themes that might be causing you distress.
Recovering from birth trauma can be a long and difficult process, but it is possible to find healing. Remember that you are not alone in this journey, and there are people who love and support you every step of the way. Seek out help if you need it, and focus on taking care of yourself both physically and emotionally.
Feeling isolated or alone
One of the risk factors of having a difficult birth is postnatal depression which makes the mother feel isolated, and in this scenario, emotional support is required. Difficult childbirth can make one avoid the second and those who have a difficult second birth will make them avoid the third birth and so on. The traumatic events of delivering a preterm baby is a life-threatening complication. Perinatal mental health as shown in medical records and even other birth stories show that anxiety disorders are most common as the mothers think about how difficult the birth process is this is seen in many mothers. On the child’s birthday as the healthcare professional delivers the mother’s report it is always pain relief or a traumatic event. A Baby’s birth is the start of a mothering career and as they start exclusive breastfeeding the childbirth trauma decreases, the baby’s feeding instincts reduce the stress hormone levels this experience helps to encourage mothers. For others the worst birth experiences including the difficult birth most are hit with the reality of how precious life is; imagine not delivering a healthy baby boy as you had hoped? You cannot feel the baby skin to skin as you had envisioned? Birth Trauma Association is always on the forefront in helping mothers recover from the trauma.
Loss of confidence or self-esteem
Loss of confidence is one of the worst birth experiences, imagine having a baby boy who is different from others, as many mothers feel positive about their babies others traumatic birth recovery is filled with negative feelings and support services have to be offered to the mother.
If you’re struggling with any of these symptoms after giving birth, it’s important
Contrary to what the term might suggest, a traumatic birth experience doesn’t necessarily stem from a physical birthing complication (e.g., a uterine inversion or an emergency C-section).
In many cases, the trauma can be psychological (e.g., stressing out over giving birth in a hospital during COVID-19). After all, the birthing experience can be incredibly stressful and physically exhausting — even when everything goes to plan.
The effects
After a traumatic birth, new mothers have to deal with physical and psychological pain.
Physical trauma
All new mothers are physically exhausted after giving birth. Since most muscles strain during contractions, it’s perfectly normal to be sore throughout the body after giving birth. Of course, there’s also vaginal bleeding and vaginal soreness to deal with. On top of this, hormones fluctuate considerably, making new mothers perhaps more emotional than normal.
While every new mother is different, it generally takes between six and eight weeks for the body to recover after giving birth.
Psychological trauma
In addition to the physical trauma that new mothers have to deal with, many women also experience psychological issues after giving birth.
Postpartum depression
As many as one in seven new mothers develop postpartum depression after giving birth. When this happens, women can feel hopeless, sad, and isolated. These feelings often translate into a decreased appetite, loss of sex drive, and lack of appetite, among other negative outcomes. On top of this, women dealing with postpartum depression may also struggle to bond with their newborns.
While exceedingly rare, some new mothers develop a condition called postpartum psychosis, which can lead to dangerous thoughts and behaviors. If you or someone you know who’s recently given birth is dealing with hallucinations, paranoia, or delusions, seek medical help immediately.
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
Depending on how bad the birthing experience is, some mothers can develop PTSD. One study found that mothers who were less educated, had less prenatal healthcare, and gave birth prematurely were most likely to be diagnosed with PTSD. Additionally, research also suggests that new mothers who’ve suffered from depression and those who were victims of childhood sexual abuse and domestic violence are also more likely to develop PTSD.
In addition to affecting a new mother’s well-being, PTSD can also damage romantic relationships. Women who’ve had a traumatic birth report a lack of sex and arguments with their significant other over the birth itself, among other things.
Now that you have a better idea of what a traumatic birth is and what a new mother might experience in the aftermath of one, let’s turn our attention to the most important piece of the puzzle: what women can do to overcome these feelings and live their best lives.
Postpartum healing
From the outset, a traumatic birth experience can seem downright devastating. But there are some things you can do to overcome the trauma.
It may take time, to be sure. But as long as you’re dedicated to improving your headspace and becoming the mom you’ve always been destined to be, you will get through this challenge before you know it. Here are some ways to make that happen.
1. Think about your experience
While you might be tempted to block your trauma out of your mind, that pain will always exist below the surface unless you confront it head-on. And that starts with being upfront with yourself. Spend time thinking about what you’ve been through and try to understand exactly why you feel the way you do. Whenever you get a moment, you might want to try journaling to really clear your mind.
Once you’ve processed your thoughts, it’s time to share them with those closest to you — your partner, your family, and your friends. Don’t share anything more than you’re comfortable with. But the sooner you can connect with someone else about what you’re going through, the faster the weight will be off your shoulders.
2. Spend time with your new child
It’s not at all uncommon for new mothers to feel disconnected from their babies after a traumatic birth. While you might not be able to prevent those feelings from happening, you can proactively try to address the issue by making a point to spend more time with your newborn. Easing into skin-to-skin contact and breastfeeding when you’re comfortable can help you get through this difficult time.
3. Talk with a professional about your birth trauma
At the end of the day, you need to know that you don’t have to deal with this entire situation on your own. While talking with your friends, family, and partner about your emotions and what’s going through your mind can be helpful, you may be best off speaking to a neutral third party when the going gets really tough after giving birth.
After all, emotional healing when you have a tiny new human in your life can be hard — even if you aren’t experiencing postpartum depression. Speaking with a professional therapist who specializes in treating new mothers can make all the difference in the world.